the rick story
01/15/01 ~ 9:05 pm
well, diary. i *cannot* believe i haven't mentioned someone very important from my past. his name is rick and he was my second boyfriend ever. (my first boyfriend was stephe, and if i'm ever bored one day, i'll go off on him.) but rick.... he was special. i could spend a long time creating a character profile for him, but i won't. i'll just summarize. but i'm warning you, it will still be long.
rick and i became friends the end of my sophomore year. we hardly saw each other that summer, but we managed to be in the same group of friends junior year. we were always bickering, and i thought he hated me, but it was actually that he liked me (juvenile guys). i went back and forth with him all year. we never even went to any dances together. the summer before senior year, we hung out a lot and got together then. it was very magical. we didn't fight or anything. we were very close emotionally because of similarities in our alcoholic homes. i was way too scared of sex to sleep with him, despite his obvious desire to do so. he broke up with me the 2nd day of senior year. he blamed it on his issues. our senior year was very rocky. we were close friends at first, then we didn't even talk, and then slowly became friends again. then i moved away and we didn't keep in touch. one night he IMed me. we had a very deep conversation and i invited him to come visit me. he came up to sacramento and his parents kicked him out. so i let him live with me. i had a bunk bed, and so he stayed in my room. even in such close quarters, we didn't even fight. he started off hanging out with me all the time, and went to parties with me. he would get really drunk at these parties and sometimes even try to kiss me. finally at one, he ended up losing his virginity to one of my friends. she was also drunk. he never told me about that, she did. he then started hanging with a bunch of church people and got this new girlfriend. eventually, me and my mom moved and he moved out. by then, he owed me about 350 dollars. he ended up moving back home and never paying me. this was summer of '99.
a year went by. i would talk about him bitterly to my friends, but eventually he just kinda faded back in my mind. then the whole summer with ned happened. less than a month after, i was thinking about rick a lot. i would dream about him, think i saw him, everything. i finally ended up writing him a card. i told him about my new friends, carefully leaving out ned. he called me right after getting the card. he was very happy to hear from me and was worried i hated him. we caught up a lot, and decided we needed to visit. he was home from being in the marines! i was shocked. well, we never saw each other and he went back to boot camp. i was in the midst of not being very happy with ned and i thought about rick *all* the time. i wondered what could have happened if i'd slept with him. i regretted not doing it. by this time, i knew ned would be gone for new years, and i started plotting. i figured i could visit rick for new years and still get that new year's kiss! (i know, i'm sick) i still hadn't told him about ned, and i wanted to do it in person, and i thought that would be a good opportunity.
i'm almost to the present time!!! well, i found out he would be in livermore for christmas and new year's, but by then, i was wrapped up in ned. i didn't need to see rick as much. so i didn't try too hard to connect with him. and we didn't see each other. so friday night when i got home from davis, i started a letter to rick. now is the time to read it.
so, i will send this letter monday from work. and then i get a card from him today.(what timing! i swear.) it's a cute little cat card and it's like, "i tried to get ahold of you... i called your house a few times and work too (of course he never left a voicemail) and i wanted to see you. well, make sure you keep in touch and we'll both write". and it had all of our favorite movie quotes and stuff written in it. but i'm still sending the letter. he'll appreciate it. i hope.
~holly~
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