my response, then his, then mine....
07/24/02 ~ 11:03 a.m.
** warning: this is pretty long now. i keep adding to it. but it's what went on with me and ted... ***
hey you. like the pictures on my little site? =)
so really, not much changed with us. i did feel a little unwanted by the time i left france however. but that's happened from time to time... we weren't a real couple, with feelings, right?
and as you've known for awhile, i want something real. so as great of friends as we are, the amount of bonding and sharing we've done, and as great as the sex was, it's not enough. i was too woosy to break it off at other times, because i still wanted to be with you.
so the clincher is, i'm dating someone. and it's not fair to you or him to keep things going with you, or to not let you know. i'd have preferred to do this in person, or at least over the phone, but france doesn't leave me much choice. sorry.
so that's why. i'll always look back fondly at all the experiences we shared, how i grew sexually with you.
[small talk about france]
talk to you later,
holly
so? hope i handled it well. sigh.
i'm posting this from heather's computer cuz mine is sucking ass. grrrrr. i'll post about last night later.
kay, then he wrote back:
[blah blah about france]
That's cool that you're dating someone. Is it someone you've mentioned before? Hope things go well. Really, I mean that. And I hope we can stay friends. Though I'm a little curious about have involved you might have been when you visited. (just being truthful, not bitchy).
That's about all for now. Gotta go finish up my art history presentation.
Ted
then i respond with:
yeah, it's my lab partner, david. but i promise, honestly, tht nothing happened till i got back. and still, we're hanging on first base.
ok, i'm going to check if you're online now.
holly
so then i signed on and he was there, so we've been chatting a bit. here's some of the important parts:
gonzo93: i was surprised you asked, i was gonna tell you about him, but give it a little while
ted: asked?
ted: about the new guy?
gonzo93: asked why i decided to break up now
ted: I think that's a reasonable question for someone to ask
gonzo93: no, no, i know it is.
gonzo93: surprised you?
ted: a little
gonzo93: why's that?
ted: just didn't expect it is all
gonzo93: me either
gonzo93: but it's better, right?
gonzo93: i mean, we weren't going anywhere
ted: yeah, I mean, I'm not arguing the descision
gonzo93: aww, darn, i was hoping you'd beg
gonzo93: ha ha ha
ted: just didn't expect to read that in my email the other day
gonzo93: sorry
ted: nothing to be sorry
ted: it was clearly stated at the beginning of the deal that if one of us wanted a real relationship at some point
ted: we could break it off
gonzo93: yeah
gonzo93: me and my "rules"
ted: (just wondering) but isn't this the guy you were saying you wouldn't ever get with
gonzo93: ha ha, kinda
gonzo93: i'm a nerd
ted: what changed there?
gonzo93: we hung out a lot, not talking about school, and i got to know him a lot better
gonzo93: he's not just a nerd, like i originally thought. he's that and more.
ted: cool... am I gonna like him?
gonzo93: yeah. he's on our wavelength.
ted: cool
so yeah. no hard feelings. i'll kinda miss him. but not as much as i'm missing david this week.
~holly~
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