that's poetic... that's pathetic
02/06/02 ~ 11:12 p.m.
i'm a little unnerved. just wondering... who is coming to my site by consistantly searching for "masturbation" on alta vista, and then coming here? and who searched for "holly" twice and came here? AND who at texas tech is reading a whole bunch of pages?
don't get me wrong, i love new readers, so if you'd like to say hi, that would rule. it's just kinda weird behavior and it's got me feeling.... weird.
tomorrow jenny and i are hitting san francisco, right after i go to the goodbye lunch polycomp is having for sarah. jenny and i are gonna hit up art museums and stuff, and it's gonna be good stuff. i think it'll do good for me to get out and hang out with my best friend that i get little one-on-one time with. =)
so, my poetry. here's the first one... i guess it kinda describes how i'm feeling lately:
the fog is cold as it touches my nose
i breeze through it, catching mist on my arm
my eyes droop, my legs burn, my heart aches
for the warm blankets that once covered me
i'm tired, exhauseted, worn out
my mind spins, landing nowhere
worries drift though, toss my thoughts, and fly away
"stop it!" i try to yell, but the worries don't listen
i return home to my slumbering place
i'm tired but i can't sleep
my mind is reeling, reeling... never settling in one place
i try, but i don't want to move. no motivation exists
what's the point? but still i worry
what if?
where is life taking me?
ok. then this next one is refecting my (conflicted) feelings on seeing a shrink, plus kinda what i expect to happen. i think it's actually hopeful:
therapist
stranger, smiling, inviting
good intentions, soft words
has all the answers?
soothing, understanding
probing, prodding
searching for meaning
heartwrencing
questions, thinking
tears, pain
why?
letting it out
cry, cry
what's wrong?
no one knows
calm
soothing, understanding
tired, worn out
heart is lighter
mind is clearer
thank you.
i'm kinda shy, and i'm no poet. i know that. but they helped me sort my thoughts today and i'd love comments if you can. thanks,
~holly~
back 
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* check the cast page for details about this person!
