mindblock
02/05/02 ~ 9:09 p.m.
i have serious motivation issues. i swear, this essay should not be that hard. but mine is gonna come out a peice of shit because i am resisting it so much. i don't want to do it so badly that i could scream. i just want to curl up in my bed with jasmine and forget about school and work and everything for awhile.
so my doctor raised my dosage. and gave me the number to call and get a therapist. and suggested that i take some time out for exercise once a day, not even for weight loss but just to feel better. (i did this afternoon! yay!) and she also had me get my blood drawn to test my thyroid.
i actually had kaiser check it about 3 years ago because i have such a problem with losing weight. their tests came out normal. but this doctor didn't even want to test it because of my weight but because of two other things -- my depression and my (sorry guys) irregular periods. before i was put on the pill, i'd only get it once every 3 or 4 months. these can both be signs of bad thyroids. i've heard horror stories about kaiser in the past, and i wouldn't be surprised to hear my thyroid is screwy. and it migh thelp me with my weight problem, too! but i better not get my hopes up, ya know? excercise can help, too. blah.
i emailed adam today. last night i was talking about a website my my pal danny runs her in davis called youseedavishardcore. it's got some cool stuff on it, but most importantly, danny is into the music scene and adam wants to get involved. so i sent him the link and a nice "hi" message. that was good, right?
i......... hate......... this....... essay...........
~holly~
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